Left Lane Larry

A Left Lane Larry is defined as that person who feels that it is their unalienable right to drive in the left lane regardless of their speed or the number of people driving behind them. If I remember correctly, and I do, the left lane is for passing only. Call me old, but if you are not driving faster than the surrounding traffic, then you should not be in the left lane.

The other morning, I was driving to work. It was later than usual as I had to drop off my son at school with his afterschool equipment. As an administrator, I have a little bit of flexibility with my time. This was one of the few times I needed to take advantage of it.  I was second in line at the traffic light to turn onto the local two-lane highway (2 lanes each way). The car in front of me was taking its time turning right, even though the light was green, and went right to the left lane (From now on, I will call him Left Lane Larry). Traffic in the right lane was slow, so I got myself into the left lane.  By the time both of us passed the slow traffic in the right lane, Left Lane Larry was driving less than the speed limit with no one in front of him. I flashed my beams and he did nothing. I went into the right lane and passed him. A few minutes later, there was slow traffic in the right lane so I switched to the left lane. There was Left Lane Larry right behind me flashing his high beams as if he was a firefighter going to a fire. I passed the slow traffic and got into the right lane. He did not pass me. A mile later, my exit came up. As I was about to take the right-lane exit, Larry cut me off from the left lane without a blinker, phone in his hand held up to his ear, and took the same exit. Now I was pissed. It is one thing to be a slow driver, it is another thing to be a dangerous driver.

Little did I know that Left Lane Larry happens to work at one of the schools that I serve as an administrator. I am confident that his supervisor handled his lateness. When he pulled into the parking lot, I could not believe that someone who guides children could be such a danger to others on the road. I feel sorry for his child(ren) who are forced to ride in the car with him. I will also make sure that I leave earlier in the morning so I do not have to worry about him sharing the road with me.

He failed the day’s interview.